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so.worth.loving

April 26, 2012 in Beautiful You with 0 Comments

Today’s the day! It’s been in the making for about a month and a half – today, I’m posting over on another blog!

That’s right – today is the announcement of me joining the team of lovely ladies over at SO WORTH LOVING! The post is a simple intro into who I am and why I think SWL is such an important message that women (& men) across the globe, in all age ranges need to hear.

So Worth Loving is a community of people dedicated to spreading that message and helping empower people to pursue their dreams. We handcraft shirts that remind you you’re loved.

I “met” Eryn, the founder, via the blog a few months ago (which Keith actually found through Eryn’s husband as he worked on web/blog design stuff!) and when the opportunity to write periodically for SWL’s blog came up, I jumped in! I’m excited for the message and community to grow, for girls & women to see that they are worth loving simply because their life is precious! And that they are so valuable no matter what struggles or heartaches they face day-to-day.

Hop on over to So Worth Loving today to read the post!

You may learn a few new things about yours truly!

ENJOI TODAY!

SCK

Feeling Accomplished

April 12, 2012 in Beautiful You with 0 Comments

Happy Thursday!

My eyes are heavy this morning as the little girl was up way too early for my liking. She was quite content on happily screeching her way through the 5 o’clock hour while twisting and turning her tiny body all over, causing me to think that something like “I got the moves like Jagger…” was flitting around her little mind.

(Yesterday’s wiggle fest!)

Today is my morning in the office without Lil’ Miss and it’s a day that allows me to feel super professional – as much as one can in an uber casual office! I donned my black blazer, made a Chai latte to go and headed out the door. As women, you know there’s outfits, accessories and even office supplies that make you feel more professional that allows your mind to proclaim,

“I am going to do something GREAT today!”

What is that outfit for you?! I’m curious to see – if you have Pinterest, go find an outfit and then add my name in the comment section so I can see it! How fun!

Beyond the outfit and outer things we add to help ourselves accomplish great things, our personalities and gifts are of the utmost importance too. Know what you’re good at, how that works with others you’re around and where you want your passions to lead you! I’m only in my mid-twenties but as a girl who grew up wanting to do EV.ERY.THI.NG, it’s taken me a while to figure out what I’m good at, how I’ve been made to create in my life and why that’s special. I’ve talked about it before but your passions, those things that drive you each day, are necessary to your daily life and your feeling valued!

This week I had the opportunity to have what I thought might be a hard conversation at work. I’d found myself the past two months falling into some roles I didn’t solely want. Being able to sit down and talk about how I am capable of doing those things, but they don’t drive me to develop who I am was a welcomed relief and in the end we realized that as a department we were on the same page but just had let other projects over-shadow the personal development that I crave.

One of my deepest desires for others is to discover what makes their hearts beat… what makes you strive to be great. What is it that you crave to do above all other things – or a combination of things that make you feel invincible. Sure, you’re capable of doing lots of things, but there are a few of those specific projects, hobbies, things that you find yourself soaring when participating.

For me, in the work realm, that’s communication plans, developing others, accomplishing tasks. It’s look ahead to project and plan something to be executed with an end goal. It’s planning the details of an event. Mentoring someone younger or newer to the field. Researching. When I’m doing those things, I’m motivated to do them the best I can and even dream of the next steps… when I’m simply doing tasks I’m capable of, the desire to do more with it is distant. A healthy combination of both is usually needed but today was one of those days I dressed to soar, to plan, to dream with a co-worker for the sake of making our jobs and our organization better.

What made you feel accomplished today?

Doesn’t need to be a major job or life-altering thing, crossing any item off a to-do list is worthy!

If you don’t have regular conversations with your co-workers, boss or even spouse about how you’re using what you’re passionate about and enjoy doing – you need to! Even if it’s uncomfortable or you think it won’t be appreciated or change your situation – DO IT! (Or at least leave a comment or email me with those things – just to talk about them can be a huge motivator!) Each of those things that inspire and speak to who you are, are key in your life, don’t ignore them!

ENJOI TODAY
and
do the things that bring a sparkle to your heart and mind at work and at home!

SCK

Talented

March 3, 2012 in Beautiful You with 0 Comments

Happy weekend! This post was for yesterday but a few different events throughout the day made me postpone it to today. I hope you’re having lovely Saturday! We were graced with a bit more snow but I saw the more devastating effects of another unpredictable weather (non)pattern down south. Sad. Weird.

March is kind of a big deal around here… it’s the month the Mr. and I started dating, the month we got engaged AND the month we tied the knot! Pretty simple and secure way to remember it all! This year (March 8th) we’ll be celebrating our 4th anniversary! I have some fabulous blast-from-the-past photo posts brewing for next week.

We’ve also been working on something MAJOR and next time you come visit, things around here will look drastically different. I’m jollity just thinking about revealing it to you! Stay tuned!

~~~

So… the past two weeks I’ve noticed a bit of a theme on almost all the blogs that I keep up with and that is one of comparison, the fight to be who we each are, staying true to ourselves and instead of wishing for the abilities of others, to enjoy and use the ones we have! As you know, this is a huge point for me and this blog. I want to encourage YOU to always be YOU, and not focus on what you’re “missing” that someone else has got.

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This is not easy! I’ll be the first to admit that comparison comes all too easily to us females! We compare E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. Of course, each of us deals with this struggle on a different level. (Perhaps we even compare our struggles with comparison!) We compare fashion styles, cooking abilities, talents, creativeness, decorating talent, hostessing skills, and much, much more! In the blog world, it’s comparing posts and creative writing ability or the fact that we often only see the sunny-side-up of others’ lives showcased.

I used to struggle big time with comparison of talents. I think I’ve somewhat conquered this and have been able to celebrate my own talents and abilities rather than wish for someone else’s. For example, when I met the Mr. and realized he is musical, I used to pray my heart out for God to change my non-ability to sing well and give me an amazing voice that others would desire to hear and almost be jealous of. How horrible is that! But I think it’s true – we often desire the talent of someone else so we can be as good or better than they are at it. Lots of prayer and growing in life brought me to a place of realizing I will NEVER be a great singer. I wasn’t designed that way and that’s A-OK with me! But I tell ya, it’s so hard to dwell in that place.

Another area is fashion. For the most part, I don’t care about the latest trends or the hottest styles. But, my best friend Becky is a freelance Stylist and Personal Shopper at J.Crew. She’s an amazingly dressed + perfectly accessorized fashionista! So cute, ALL.the.time. Her style is lovely and her beautiful passion is to help make her clients (&friends) feel gorgeous and confident. I LOVE that about her. (Plus, she loves to go shopping with me – nothing’s better than someone who understand your style and will just take the $ and pick out perfect things for yoU!) If I’m honest, there have been times in the past when if I was meeting up with her I’d spend extra time thinking about my outfit and trying to make it better than others I’ve worn that week. It took a while for my head to catch up with the known fact that she doesn’t care or base our friendship on the critique of my outfits! I love her advice and her ability to match the perfect blend of personal style with trends! I don’t have that ability, I’m not a big accessory gal but I can take joy and celebrate HER talent in that area.

Those are just two example of the struggle of comparison and what I’ve learned from each. I share those because I think the root of beating this ugly beast of comparing ourselves to others isn’t just telling yourself to stop. But I think it’s to focus on celebrating the abilities, talents and gifts of others. If you can focus on being thankful others are made unique and everyone is good at something, then you spend less time wanting it yourself.

In fact, it’s so much more delightful to know that you have friends surrounding you that can call cover an area of life – sure I can learn different things from other’s abilities but I want to celebrate their uniqueness and if I’m just wishing to be like them, that takes away from them as much as it takes away from me. The quote floating around Pinterest and the blog world as of late is,

“COMPARISON IS THE THIEF OF JOY”

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Oh how true those words ring in our ears. As we enJOY the special things each of those around us is capable of, we spend less time focused on wanting what they have been gifted with and more time pulling out their abilities as we ask them to use those in our lives.

For me, I have a hubby that plays and sings wonderfully and can teach me about music and answer my questions; I had a best friend that can help me shop for the perfect outfit and decorate my house; I have a neighbor who can sew craft projects that I don’t have the desire/time to do, I have a sister who belongs on the Food Network with her mad cooking skills and passion; I have a Mom who is an amazing photographer; I have friends who have hours to spend putting together the perfect blog posts of trendy treats. I want to CELEBRATE that about each of them and use it to my advantage in my life. If I could do all those things myself, I wouldn’t get to hang out with them or appreciate them as much as I can now.

And me… what CAN I do well? I think I’m good at encouraging others, I think I can be a pretty good writer, I know I have the ability to love on others and be sensitive to their needs and help fulfill them. I have a passion for photography but don’t always take the best shots… but I celebrate the great ones I do take. I love having mentoring relationships with teens. I can create good meals. I think I’m a pretty good mama to Lil’ Miss. I help people have fun and can bring a smile to another’s face to change their day for a moment or more. I’ve had to realize that most of my talents are not visible talents per se (such as singing, fashionista, uber-creative) but more internal, or seen through my actions or more one-on-one. I think it’s harder for those of us whose talents are more hidden from the outward expressions to felt talented often, but you are! Take it from someone who is right there with ya!

Take a moment, or an hour and think about (I’m a fan of lists, so put it in a list so you can see it!) all the things you are GOOD at, things you KNOW you have the ability to do well, things others have told you that you do well and they appreciate about you.

YOU are beautiful,
YOU are talented,
YOU put together cute outfits all the time,
YOU say the right things at the right time,
YOU make other feel special,
YOU have talent,
YOU SHINE!

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Something that I cat leave out of this post as it’s hand-in-hand with this messy thing called comparison is learning to accept compliments. It seems simple yet it took me years to realize the importance! Mr. actually taught me during our first few years together (one that my Mom had continually tried to teach me as a teen and I never actually got right). When you choose to negate a compliment that has been given to you, you are proclaiming that the person who gave you the compliment is wrong in their thinking, or more bluntly – you’re calling them a liar.

So very often us ladies find it all too easy to put off what someone compliments us on. Someone says, “You look so good today.” We reply (with full on un-approving smirk) “Oh, now I just ran out the door and feel like a mess.” Or your own hubby may tell you that you cooked a great meal and you’ll give 10 different reasons why it wasn’t perfect or didn’t deserve that compliment. I’m sure not everyone deals with this struggle but I think “we’re not good enough” is wound around our minds so tightly that it’s hard to just say Thank You sometimes. More than a verbal response – do we actually BELIEVE what this person is saying? Choosing to believe the compliments and not hold them up in comparison to someone else has to be learned! A re-wiring is required.

Choose to rewire!

DO
the things YOU do well,

CELEBRATE
the talents, abilities and gifts of your friends & others

ACCEPT
the compliments that others desire to bless your life with!
–

I challenge each of my readers to leave a comment with three things YOU know you do well!
(A talent, gift, ability, passion you have, etc)

Thanks for popping by today!

Enjoi Today!

SCK

Disclaimer: I do not in any way claim to be an expert at any of this! I’m just a girl struggling through the same things as you in my own little way! I hope this will only encourage you to continue conquering these struggles!

Shimmering Self

February 17, 2012 in Beautiful You with 1 Comment

Well hello there lovelies!

It’s a beautiful day to celebrate LIFE and LOVE and YOU!

Today,

if it’s raining – skip & jump in the puddles;

if it’s sunny – take a mid-day stroll;

if it’s snowing – make a snow angel!
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Wherever you are – do something FUN that will make a memory and cause great laughter!
Even if you’re not having the best of days, do something that will make it GREAT!
It’s your choice!

Well, my bathroom still isn’t clean and I didn’t take the nap I planned to yesterday! But no beating myself up here! Instead, after laying my head down on a pillow for 2.3 minutes, I got up, made a cup of coffee and sat down with my journal & Bible. I figured that a little caffeine and a little time with my Creator could cure the to-do list blues!
Lo & behold I was right.

I know you’re just begging to know what’s going on in this little brain of mine today! If not, why would you be here?! Ha! My mind is full, all.the.time.
Ideas, plans, to-do’s, quotes, people, (with a whole lotta) ETC.!

I’m in the process of re-designing this little corner of life and am trying to really put myself into it. Finding what will best tell of my life and love for life! And today, I started reading The Sacred Romance. The first three pages of this book were amazing, describing exactly how I strive to live! Not for the accomplishments the world looks for but out of the place my heart desires. The passion in there. Doing those things that fill me up instead of what the world expects of me. It was refreshing to be reminded of how I am made for that exact thing. Not for climbing corporate ladders, or meeting the expectations of someone else.

What a relief!

Below is one excerpt from the book pages I read this morning:

“Starting very early, life has taught all of us to ignore and distrust the deepest yearnings of our heart. Life, for the most part, teaches us to suppress our longing and live only in the external world where efficiency and performance are everything. We have learned from parents and peers, at school, at work and even from our spiritual mentors that something else is wanted from us other than our heart, which is to say, that which is most deeply us. Very seldom are we ever invited to live out of our heart. If we are wanted, we are often wanted for what we can offer functionally. If rich, we are honored for our wealth; if beautiful, for our looks; if intelligent, for our brains. So we learn to offer only those parts of us that are approved, living our a carefully crafted performance to gain acceptance from those who represent life to us. We divorce ourselves from our heart and begin to live a double life. Frederick Buechner expresses this phenomenon in his biographical work, Telling Secrets:

“[Our] original shimmering self gets buried so deep we hardly live out of it at all… rather, we learn to live out of all the other selves which we are constantly putting on and taking off like coats and hats against the world’s weather.”

Here, busyness substitutes for meaning, efficiency substitutes for creativity,
and functional relationships substitute for love.“

Wow.

He sums up what most people (at least most Americans) live out of. Not from their heart and the passions/desires that are there, but for the external pressures – the job, the volunteer duties, the expectations.

STOP!

My whole life, the idea of this blog, my ministry with teens, the ways I spend my days, have always been in pursuit of fighting against the way the world teaches. Somedays it’s harder than others, some people resist the truth of this more than others and work even harder to put expectations on you or to help you believe the lie that the passions and desires are for your extracurricular time. I don’t buy it. I never will.

Ponder on this with me today, what are the lies you’re buying into that the world has taught you about putting your heart and what it beats for aside. Choose to believe today that the depths of what makes you giddy, smile, feel your best is important. It IS who you are, it IS what you should be doing. Choose to not listen to those folks who think jobs are the most important thing and that your accomplishments tell of the person you are!

I pray that today, you will see that those pieces of confetti on your heart where you jump for joy and celebrate life, are there for a reason! To make your life beautiful, to be YOU!